Southgate Love Dare

2009-03-13T18:29:00.000-07:00

I am making my first entry, FINALLY! We had such a great home group tonight. What I have loved is hearing about other couples' highs & lows and realizing that our struggles are so similar. Our group decided that instead of "Love Dare" the book should have been titled, "How to perform open heart surgery...on YOURSELF!" But we all agreed there might have been far less people interested in taking on the challenge. We are all changing. Kipp even made the comment that he found himself folding clothes without thinking..."I'll do this as a love dare thing". It's becoming involuntary. God bless all of you who are on the journey. You can do it! Don't give up! Some of us are behind a little but we are encouraging one another not to let that get us down. Now matter when we finish, we are going to finish. And maybe we'll be like Caleb from the movie & we'll keep going way past Day 40! Blessings, Marta

2009-03-03T12:19:00.000-08:00

The Love Dare assignment was to greet Ramona in a way that made her feel special. OK, that sounds good, but how do I do that? We had a meeting in Elkhart at Voice Ministries later that day. I knew I could ambush her there. By the time she arrived, the meeting had begun. I had arranged for the secretary to call me when she arrived. When I got that call, I left for the lobby where I knelt down and said, "My queen has arrived." I laid a big kiss on her, picked her up and carried her down the long hall to the office where I plopped her down in the chair awaiting her. I hadn't picked her up like that in years. We laughed all the way down the hallway. She said my face kept getting more and more red and she wondered if I would drop dead in the journey. We have laughed often about this since that day. This was a great exercise for me to do because it is too easy to make my greetings fall into the routine of the day. I have been more mindful of how I greet her since that day. Ramona and I hope the Love Dare is stretching you too. God Bless your marriage.

John Wilson

Peach Pie, Love Dare and Great Questions

2009-02-22T14:05:00.000-08:00

I'm at the church working late when I get a call from my son Caleb. "Dad, where are you? Come home now, it is late." Thinking my son was anxious to be with his dad, I said, "Ok son, wait up for me I'll come right home." Upon walking in the front door I saw a peach pie Monie had made me as part of the Love Dare. She had told Caleb that he couldn't touch the pie until I got the first piece. Now I understood my son's urgency.

This morning at Southgate Church, we heard testimonies about what has made the difference in three couples lives. As I sat listening to these friends talk about marriage, I thought how good it is to be gut level honest in church. To be transparent causes others to want to be open about what is going on in their lives. We fielded some text questions from the congregation as they heard the stories of love and marriage. I want to share some of those questions and comments with you now.

How do you forgive and let go of a pain that your partner has caused you?

Talk about the importance of keeping the romance in everyday activities... not falling into the routine of complacency.

I feel my cultural upbringing inhibits my ability to be loving and affectionate. How do I begin to break that cycle?

What should be the main core values in a couples relationship?

How do you love your spouse if the relationship started with hurt?

If your spouse is angry and wants you to stop tithing, and going to church and then continually persecutes your faith- do you need to choose between the two?

How do you know when you are truly in love?

Can you ever be ready for marriage? We are not perfect and we are not in control. It is a journey.

Over the next five weeks, those taking the Love Dare will have a great opportunity to get these questions and many others answered. Issues will get resolved, fears displaced and hearts renewed by love. It is not too late to join the team. Get a Love Dare book and start doing what it tells you to do. And by the way, that peach pie was awesome. Thank you Monie.

2009-02-14T05:53:00.000-08:00

What a night! I'm guessing 250 people were at Southgate to see Fireproof. As we sat there in the dark watching the movie I was thinking how many lives and families will be impacted if we all were to take the Love Dare. The potential for upgrades in marriages is huge. The possibilities for higher dimensions of love in our relationships is the prize. For all who are taking the Love Dare, we will be reminded that love is expressed in ACTION. Each day we will be instructed to invest in our partners with attitudes and behaviors that reflect the God kind of love. The dictionary says that a dare is something that requires courage to do. Let's muster the courage and take the Love Dare together. There are encouragement groups available for those who want the support of others to keep our courage going. The Love Dare retreat will be a wonderful culmination of the 40 day journey. We are on our way, buy the Love Dare book, jump into the current and get a marriage upgrade.

marriage in the midst of the urgent

2009-02-02T09:56:00.002-08:00

Sometimes in the thick of living this life, we can really get our best priorities lost in the mix. It is so easy to do. Most of us don't lose our way on purpose, we just get off track. The urgent seems to carry a louder voice than the values of greatest importance. We can find ourselves saying something like this, "My marriage is ok, it is solid. I can throw myself into these other things and there won't be a problem". Because the urgent rarely lets up it's relentless demand, what was originally intended to be a short diversion becomes a lifestyle of neglect of our marriage. The ramifications are devastating. We need help to get re-focused, get healed and get headed down the right road with our eyes fixed upon the best priorities.

Ramona and I are really excited and committed to this upcoming Southgate Love Dare. We hope that 100 couples will take the challenge to upgrade their relationship over a 40 day period of time. Our hope is that you and your spouse will be among them. We have found that if we don't guard our relationship and invest in each other on purpose, we get weaker as a couple. How about you? We hope to see you at the movie night at Southgate on Feb. 13th at 7pm when we watch the movie "Fireproof" and put out the challenge for couples to take the Love Dare. This is really going to change things, so get ready!!!